Making Blogging Friends {Gaby’s Discussion}

Posted 21 June, 2013 by Amanda / 30 Comments

(re)Discovering the Basics

Blogging is HARD. If you’ve ever searched for a road map only to come up empty handed, you’re not alone. (Re)Discovering the Basics chronicles one blogger’s (Gaby’s!) journey to finding her own way in the online world. Together, we’ll open the discussion on how we blog and what both new and established bloggers can learn from each other.

Amanda’s note: The only thing I have to add to this is STOP waiting for people to come to you. Friends don’t magically appear in front you. Go out and make them. If you’d like to read the reasoning behind this discussion series, you can check out my interview with Gaby.

Y’know when you’re on Twitter and you’re following all these bloggers and you’re just sitting there and staring at the words? Your brain is spinning and your heart is racing and you pick an inane Tweet about puppies some blogger Tweeted in an effort to drum up conversations and make friends? Yeah. This was me like 6 months ago. I had no idea what I was doing and I wanted to already be at the “having friends” part with the talking and the excitement and sharing, but I WASN’T.

So what did I do? Well, I worked at it. I worked on not being afraid of what other bloggers might think in response to MY response. I worked on not being afraid to make typos (because DEAR GOD do they ever happen on Twitter). I worked on being clever and catching people’s attention while still being me – in 140 characters (that’s probably the hardest one). I also went on other people’s blogs and commented on their Top Ten Tuesdays and Stacking the Shelves and Waiting on Wednesdays, linked them back to me and tweeted at them (okay, this a mild form of stalking but WHATEVER).

Mostly, you need to feel comfortable just jumping in. The blogging pool is a BIG ONE but it’s warm and friendly and pee-free and you should just get going.

But y’know what? If you’re still scared, you should scroll down and check out some of the awesome blogging friendship stories/things people like to talk about responses I’ve collected over the last few days.

So here’s the question I asked:

And here are some of the response I got:

DEBBY @ Snuggly Oranges

Kelly @ Reading the Paranormal & Amanda, YOUR HOSTESS WITH THE MOSTESS

Christina @ Reader of Fictions & Jenni @ Alluring Reads

Betty @ Book Rock Betty

And then ONE QUICK STORY about Alexa @ Alexa Loves Books and ME!

From the lovely Alexa:

“You tweeted me and I totally went over to check out your blog! I was in the middle of culling books, and wanted to give them to someone who appreciated them. We decided to meet for lunch at Panera, ordered EXACTLY the same thing without consulting one another, and the rest is history.”

SO. Do you struggle to make blogging friends? Maybe you have a few and have a good story. Either way, talk to me about all of the friend things in the comments below!

Filed under: Discussion,

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30 Responses to “Making Blogging Friends {Gaby’s Discussion}”

  1. I don’t have any blogging friends yet. (At least I don’t think I do. If I do and you’re one of them, please let me know. I’m clueless about these things, haha.)

    Like Gaby said, it’s all about working up the courage to interact with other bloggers. When I first started blogging, I would NEVER tweet a blogger or comment on a post – I was too shy! Eventually, though, I realized that I need to talk to other bloggers if I wanted to befriend them, haha. Once you tweet or comment enough, people will start to recognize your name. Some of my favorite bloggers follow me on Twitter now because I interacted with them on multiple occasions, and some of my favorite bloggers recognize me when I comment on their blogs! I think it’s something that happens slowly over time.

    This was a fantastic post!

    • So true–there have been a lot of people who I’ll follow after they talk to me a few times on Twitter. And I’m all, “Hey, I need to talk with this person more.” And the more you continue talking, the more likely a friendship will be born. :)

  2. Oh yes Gaby! I definitely struggled with making friends on Twitter too. I was all “Ummmm. I ate PB&J for lunch Twitter. What say you to that?” I just had no idea what to say, and like you, was nervous to respond or butt in to other peoples’ Twitter conversations. That passed though, and now I just throw myself in at random times:) I still am not a huge Tweeter though, I more often join conversations that start them, but I’m a work in progress!

  3. I definitely struggle in this area. I’m slowly working at it, but it’s such an uphill battle sometimes. I just have to throw myself out there and not worry about how it comes off or whatnot. I need to get over my fears (irrational, unfounded ones) and just DO IT. The times that I have, it’s been a good experience (and I didn’t feel the pool was too warm from pee that I needed to shower after… ;) ), so that’s helpful in me doing it again. (A few of those experiences have been with the ever-present Amanda.)

  4. Once upon a time, Amanda cracked her whip and told me to write. I totally listened. (this was last night, btw) (then she was all “Now that I told Kelly to leave Twitter and go write, I am lonely.”) (meanwhile, I was trying to wrangle my broody demon and his shy love interest into doing dirty things to one another.) (alas, those two are still waiting for their moment of completion.) (I will be writing again today, leaving Amanda to the desolate landscape of a Kelly-less Twitter.) (woe.)

  5. Oh man, I’ve been here before with the watching the tweets and feeling out of place. I wasn’t involved in the community at all for about a year and a half, and when I found it I was dazed and confused. But, once you start talking, you do find your little internet home.

    Bahaha, “warm and friendly and pee-free.”

    Lol, typo on my blog name.

    Most of my close blogger friendships began with a negative review, whether mine or theirs. A lot of personally tends to shine through on those reviews. That’s how I met Kara (her review of Wrecked), Debby (her review of September Girls), Jamie (her review of Nobody But Us, which I’d also just read and not liked), got really close to Steph (when we suffered through Prophecy at the same time).

    I wish I could remember that BAM BEST FRIENDS NOW moment with everyone, but I do not. Trying to remember when you and Gillian popped into my life. HMMM.

  6. I love this subject. My favorite quote is Amanda saying you can’t wait for friends to magically appear in front of you. That’s exactly what I do! (In fact, that’s how I plan to meet my future husband and win the lottery.)

    I would love to have a few special bloggy friends. I often get lonely in the great big blogging world, but my shyness is the biggest thing for me. And preconceived notions – what if they don’t want to be friends with me? What if it’s a clique I can’t join..?

    • Don’t get me wrong: it’s HARD to get out there and insert yourself into conversations. But I also know that it’s very rare to have people just be like, “Hey, wanna be friends?” It’s something that takes work and effort. (But it’s also worth it in the end.)

      Btw, whenever I respond to tweets or comment on blogs, I always figure that if they don’t take the time to respond to me, they’re probably not the kind of people I want to have in my circle anyway.

  7. I just started commenting on people’s blogs. That led to chatting on Twitter (though I’ve had a lot less time to do this lately than I like) and meeting IRL at BEA! It was progressive… but what I learned is you’ve got to get on out there. It may work. It may not but it’s definitely worth it!

  8. My number one rule is to comment more on other people’s blogs. I started there even before I started my book blog because, why were people going to read mine when I obviously didn’t care about theirs? From there, I made some amazing friends. I’ve met some IRL. Some I only chat up occasionally when the right post comes up. Some I chat up way too much (oh hai Amanda!).

  9. I think the place I’ve made the most friends is through events like Bout of Books and of course Twitter Parties. I met four girls during a twitter party and talk to them every day now! I agree about not waiting for friends to magically appear before you. It’s just like the real world. If you are a wallflower and never go into the crowd you’ll be alone forever. It’s sad, but true. But luckily there are so many events, readathons, goodreads groups, book signings, etc out there to get involved in.

  10. I struggle with making blogging friends. I try to jump in on twitter but see things hours late or feel kind of dumb. And sometimes it seems like everyone is all friended up already and I don’t want to intrude which is probably dumb but feelings are dumb sometimes. I’m trying to chat more, though! I’ve met a few people I think of as friends through Armchair BEA and I met some cool people on Feature and Follow Friday.

    This is a great post, I need to work on being less afraid of responses and jump in!

  11. This is something I struggle with all the time. Especially because I am not always connected to my accounts. Yes, blogging is hard, but I love it. Hopefully once I am out of school I can get back into the swing of things full time. Another great post!

    Do you mind if I link this to a post I just wrote about linking up with other (book) bloggers? You can read the post here:

    http://ladybluejay.com/2013/06/23/how-to-connect-with-other-bloggers-in-the-book-blogging-world/

  12. I made most of my book blogging friends through Twitter! It’s always fun to hold conversations with everyone on there, and it’s always about the most random things too. I love that we all love books! I also love discovering fellow aspiring writers, fellow mac and cheese fan (ehehehe) and fellow celebrity fans. Seriously, Twitter is the best ever for bringing me all these friends!

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